If You Can’t Beat Them …Ignore Them

How many times have you heard this being said “If you can’t Beat them, Join them” which really means if you can’t stand up for your own beliefs and if you can’t make a point out of your thoughts and feelings and if you can’t live your purpose and reach your goals, just give up and join the others. And instead of standing for our beliefs and instead of being the change you want to see in this world, just forget about it and start living someone else’s dreams because it is much easier than making a point and it is much easier than fighting an emotional battle, it is much easier to step into a life that is ready instead of creating a new life, a new success and a new change. It is easier to do what everyone else seems to be doing than starting your own path because when you join the crowd there is nothing to explain and you don’t have to make a point, there is no battle to fight, everything is a given just follow the steps of all the ordinary people out there.

Actually there is nothing wrong with being ordinary many people choose to be ordinary and live a life that is controlled by a routine where the changes and challenges are very limited. This reminds me of the funny but sad story of Mr. Ordinary. Mr. Ordinary had a great dream but no one listened to Mr. Ordinary because everyone who knew Mr. Ordinary thought that Mr. Ordinary was too ordinary to make a dream come true. The battle was hard for Mr. Ordinary and someone told him “If you can’t Beat them Join them.” Mr. Ordinary decided to give up the dream that seemed too hard to accomplish. Mr. Ordinary decided to make a change in his life and he finally found the Ordinary women he was looking for, they got married, they lived in

an ordinary house and had ordinary jobs, Mr. and Mrs. Ordinary decided to have children and they brought to this world ordinary kids who went to school and received ordinary grades, all the children also ended up with ordinary jobs and lives.

Mr. and Mrs. Ordinary lived a very Ordinary long life and later they both left this world in an ordinary manner the memories they left behind were very ordinary, their marks were very ordinary. Because it was easier to live ordinary than it is to create greatness and live a great dream.

When I was in school my father use to look at my final grades and when he sees ordinary grades he tells me “If you are not getting tired now, one day you will be really tired” he means if I don’t get myself tired by putting the effort and time to create greatness while I can, one day when it is too late I will be sick and tired of living the life that I have to live instead of a life that I love to live. So every time I remember these words “If I don’t get tired I will get tired” I get really motivated to put an effort into the things that sometimes seem like impossible to accomplish.

While I try living my purpose and creating my dreams I bump into so many obstacles and I get bruised sometimes and my friends start telling me “when are you going to have an ordinary life and be like us, you are missing so many nice things, you’re missing on the parties and missing the best TV.” Shows you are getting yourself too tired and I can hear a voice whispering “If you can’t beat them, Join them.” I answer hem; “I am busy creating my dream, I’m giving up ordinary for what I dream to be extraordinary. I would rather live an extraordinary life, and leave behind extraordinary memories and traces, than enjoying what is only ordinary. As hard as it seems to be I would rather honor my truth, create my dream and live my purpose.”

I wonder how many times some of us gave up and surrendered to the words “If you can’t beat them, Join them.” I am sure it happens a lot and sometimes we give up on some things and ideas, yes sometimes we do compromise when it comes to giving up small things. Just last week my family and I were going to dine out, everyone wanted Indian food while I was really craving Chinese food, I decided not to fight the battle and I joined them, however I gave up what was good for what was great, the purpose was not the food the purpose was to enjoy a good time out with the family.

Sometimes it is alright to join the crowd, not everything in our lives has to be a battle, however there are battles that are worth the fight and you need to know how to choose your battles. Years back I learned that I can live in peace and I learned that I don’t have to fight everything and I don’t need to beat anyone, and I don’t have to join the crowd. I learned to do what I love to do in the best most appropriate manner and when the going gets tough and the voices get loud, I learned not to Beat but to Ignore all what stands in the way of my goals, I learned that the real battle is not between me and others, it is rather between me, my fears and my procrastinations. It is the internal negative voices that we need to ignore until we beat them.

So next time when it comes to your dreams and beliefs, and others start questioning your capabilities and try to pull you back to the crowd, just remember this; don’t join them, just ignore them.

I wish you success,

Salsabila Al-Harby